Blonde is as blonde does

This is a story from from an old email to Gypsy and Mom, but I thought it worth filling the rest of you in on:

Yesterday, someone stopped me and asked me for a lighter for his cigarette. I didn't understand the word, but I understood the motion and managed to shrug and shake my head in a way that he understood without me having to reveal I couldn't speak French. Well, today I found matches in my purse and thought "Ah ha! If someone asks me for a lighter again, I'll be able to offer them a match, which will make me feel very helpful and French." (Truly, I had this very thought.) So, today a girl stopped me and I thought from her hand motion she was asking for a lighter. I dug through my purse for my matches. She shook her head "no" and kept repeating herself in French (obviously). Finally, she pointed to my pants. My zipper was down.